Recently I was in conversation with a young woman who's child googled something quite innocent only to be pulled into the dark recesses of the black hole and hideous sphere of the Internet. The child is far from a teenager.
Parent please don't wait to put a safe guard on your computers. If your child is using them for any amount at all the temptation is TOO GREAT and the availability of pornography etc is just a click away.
We cannot be ignorant any longer!
The money you spend on this safe guard is much cheaper than years of counsel and family strife.
Please make sure that your child is in your sight when on the computer and check the history of the computer often. Stay alert and be intentional and ask questions.
Pure eyes:
http://www.puresight.com/child-internet-safety2.html?gclid=CMa_mLqwva4CFYio4Aodmk4HuA
Action Alert
http://www.actionalert.com/landing4?rkg_id=c-318740790_h-e64de79e4932edf98e73952c49c40f81_t-1330319145&gclid=CJeF9YCxva4CFULe4
Family Life Today recommends:
http://www.familylife.com/site/apps/nlnet/content3.aspx?c=dnJHKLNnFoG&b=6580043&ct=11231607
Focus on the Family
http://www.focusonthefamily.com/parenting/protecting_your_family/preparing_your_child_for_the_online_world.aspx
and
http://www.focusonthefamily.com/topicinfo/Internet_Safety_-_Building_Character_and_Building_Walls.pdf
Safe Eyes
http://www.internetsafety.com/press-internet-safety-solution-safe-eyes.php
Blessings on you and yours!
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Reinforce Your Marriage
This message contains graphics. If you do not see the graphics, click here to view.
http://links.myfamilytalk.
How to Avoid 11 "Great Marriage Killers"
Dr. Dobson's latest newsletter is now available online at drjamesdobson.org!
Earlier this month we enjoyed Valentine's Day, a day set aside for the celebration of romantic love. We hope you and your spouse relished this opportunity to affirm your undying affection and commitment. In his letter this month, Dr. Dobson flips the coin over and shares insight and great advice on how to avoid the "Great Marriage Killers."
We encourage you to spend a few moments to learn how to protect your sacred relationship from:
- Over-commitment and physical exhaustion.
- Excessive credit and conflict over how money will be spent.
- Selfishness.
- And more!
Simply click here to read and download this entire message.
http://links.myfamilytalk.
http://links.myfamilytalk.
How to Avoid 11 "Great Marriage Killers"
Dr. Dobson's latest newsletter is now available online at drjamesdobson.org!
Earlier this month we enjoyed Valentine's Day, a day set aside for the celebration of romantic love. We hope you and your spouse relished this opportunity to affirm your undying affection and commitment. In his letter this month, Dr. Dobson flips the coin over and shares insight and great advice on how to avoid the "Great Marriage Killers."
We encourage you to spend a few moments to learn how to protect your sacred relationship from:
- Over-commitment and physical exhaustion.
- Excessive credit and conflict over how money will be spent.
- Selfishness.
- And more!
Simply click here to read and download this entire message.
http://links.myfamilytalk.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
5 Love Languages of Children
http://www.focusonthefamily.com/popups/media_player.aspx?LatestDaily=1
Please listen to this half hour long Focus on the Family broadcast and see what you can glean!
Blessings on your MOST IMPORTANT JOB IN THE WORLD!
Blessings!
Please listen to this half hour long Focus on the Family broadcast and see what you can glean!
Blessings on your MOST IMPORTANT JOB IN THE WORLD!
Blessings!
Thursday, February 16, 2012
10 ways to love your kids
I thought that this article sent by a friend was worth passing along
Blessings!
David Philobes is located in Phoenix. Originally from Egypt, he is pastoring an Arabic
Christian Church.
Blessings!
David Philobes is located in Phoenix. Originally from Egypt, he is pastoring an Arabic
Christian Church.
1) Eagerly, humbly submit to the Word of God.
When you sin in front of your children, confess it. When you assert your authority over them, your children should clearly see the authority that you are submitting to. Your submission to God is your qualification to teach them. Let them see it, and they will know that you aren’t a petty tyrant.
2) Don’t pigeonhole your children.
Seemingly harmless things like calling your children “the artistic one,” “the athletic one,” or “the loving one” can make your children feel like their value to you is tied up in one characteristic. It can further invite sibling rivalry and resentments. Moreover, sets you up to stop trying to learn about them, as you begin to interpret everything through that expectation and sets them up to think that that's the only part of them you appreciate.
3) Discipline biblically.
When you discipline, make sure it has a biblical category. A godly parent can't discipline for “being annoying,” “making a mess,” or “squirming.” Instead, look to correct disobeying, lying, or something that you can support with Scripture, Proverbs and Ephesians in particular. If there isn’t a biblical principle and name behind it, don’t discipline for it.
4) Set clear expectations.
Explain to your children in advance what you expect from them and what they can expect from you. Make sure they understand. This will greatly aid you in #3, as well as giving them the security of knowing what you want.
5) Recognize obedience.
Talk to your children when you aren’t correcting them. Talk about the things they do right. Tell them about specific things that you love about them. Let them know that you know them, that you think of them, and that you enjoy them.
6) Listen to the whole story first.
With little kids you actually might have to take some time to get the story out. Don’t try to hustle past your children in an effort to quickly discipline them. The discipline is for their benefit, not yours. Make sure that they understand and that they know you are interacting with them.
7) Honor your spouse in front of them.
Show love to each other in front of your children. Don't be short, snarky, or snide with each other in their presence (or out of it for that matter). Children need to see Mom and Dad as one. Parents in fellowship with each other is one of the most basic elements for a secure home.
8) Don’t change your behavior toward your children in public.
Don’t correct them for things just because someone is watching. Security for a child means knowing that their parent is for them, and that when one of them corrects the child, it is for his or her benefit, and not so that others will think the parents have it all together.
9) Don’t take your children’s sins as a personal insult.
Never discipline with a break in fellowship. Don’t be “mad” at your children. Be anxious to have things reconciled.
10) Forgive. For real.
If breaking the window has been forgiven, act like it. Forget it. Do not hold past incidents over your children, especially if you've told them you've forgiven them. Let it go all the way, every time, “as far as the east is from the west” (Psalm 103:12).
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
I Hate to be the Mean Parent
Oh well~
If you are doing it right you will be ~ OFTEN. It's just part of the job.
The fact is you know you are NOT being mean. Your children have the perception of a child and their understanding is that of immaturity.
I hear single moms say this often ~ They feel like everything is PARADISE for their children at the other parent's home. Lets think about that....do you really think so? Children don't tend to change that much between houses. So just know that it is not always as it "seems"
Anyway, it has nothing to do with that.
The TOTAL reason you discipline your children is so that they will become high functioning, responsible human beings. We want them to listen, know how to follow directions, come when called, learn how to complete a task, get along with each other, have manners, take care of their possessions, and the list could go on and on.
The only way to get them from A to Z is to mean business. Mean what you say and say what you mean. Sometimes the consequence is more than just a time out. Sometimes it has to be corporal. But the earlier you start the easier it will be. Remember my post of "nip it in the bud" I encourage you to look it up.
So Mom and/or Dad ~ take a deep breath and choose to day to be your "child's best friend" by being the parent who makes the hard decisions, the one who follows through, the one who has to miss things themselves because a child is serving an early bedtime. It will not last forever and there will be a day that you will be glad that you followed through and your children will "rise up and call you blessed!"
Blessings!
If you are doing it right you will be ~ OFTEN. It's just part of the job.
The fact is you know you are NOT being mean. Your children have the perception of a child and their understanding is that of immaturity.
I hear single moms say this often ~ They feel like everything is PARADISE for their children at the other parent's home. Lets think about that....do you really think so? Children don't tend to change that much between houses. So just know that it is not always as it "seems"
Anyway, it has nothing to do with that.
The TOTAL reason you discipline your children is so that they will become high functioning, responsible human beings. We want them to listen, know how to follow directions, come when called, learn how to complete a task, get along with each other, have manners, take care of their possessions, and the list could go on and on.
The only way to get them from A to Z is to mean business. Mean what you say and say what you mean. Sometimes the consequence is more than just a time out. Sometimes it has to be corporal. But the earlier you start the easier it will be. Remember my post of "nip it in the bud" I encourage you to look it up.
So Mom and/or Dad ~ take a deep breath and choose to day to be your "child's best friend" by being the parent who makes the hard decisions, the one who follows through, the one who has to miss things themselves because a child is serving an early bedtime. It will not last forever and there will be a day that you will be glad that you followed through and your children will "rise up and call you blessed!"
Blessings!
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
I caught just a few minutes of Dr. Phil the other night as I was cooking. It was a continuation of a dramatic saga of the "Dr Phil family" that is shown off and on over the past years. The young girl (now in her 20's and in a rehab) said of her Dad, "I just want him to tell me No"
Did you hear that parents?
Your children WANT you to tell them NO!
They cannot always do it themselves.
They are pulled and pushed, prodded and manipulated by their peers, school mates, television, music etc etc etc.
They are often too weak and or confused to make the right decision. We all know that from about 11 up they are just a MESS!!
Let's help them out!
Say No when you have to ~ Protect them ~ Let them know that you love them and will stop them when you have to. You are not here to be their friend ~ You are their PARENT. Make a difference in their life. They will thank you later
Blessings
Did you hear that parents?
Your children WANT you to tell them NO!
They cannot always do it themselves.
They are pulled and pushed, prodded and manipulated by their peers, school mates, television, music etc etc etc.
They are often too weak and or confused to make the right decision. We all know that from about 11 up they are just a MESS!!
Let's help them out!
Say No when you have to ~ Protect them ~ Let them know that you love them and will stop them when you have to. You are not here to be their friend ~ You are their PARENT. Make a difference in their life. They will thank you later
Blessings
Monday, February 13, 2012
Valentines Day ~
Do something special for the kids today.
You may be going out to dinner with your husband but spread a little love to the children as well.
Make some heart place mats out of construction paper
Heart shaped food, hamburger, bread , cookies
Buy some sweet tart hearts and share them while watching a movie
Have the kids write a love note to grandparents or neighbor or an elderly person.
Make a special dessert
If this is too short notice do it the next day ~ it is never too late.
Spread the love and it will come back to you!
Blessings!
You may be going out to dinner with your husband but spread a little love to the children as well.
Make some heart place mats out of construction paper
Heart shaped food, hamburger, bread , cookies
Buy some sweet tart hearts and share them while watching a movie
Have the kids write a love note to grandparents or neighbor or an elderly person.
Make a special dessert
If this is too short notice do it the next day ~ it is never too late.
Spread the love and it will come back to you!
Blessings!
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Reins
As the worn out mom shared with me this morning, I kept getting the same thought. "It is time to buy a set of reins, make them shorter please "
Her son and daughter have been allowed to "swim out too deep", run too fast, have too much freedom and things have gone amuck.
The children have responded with ignoring their mom, sarcasm, criticism and all round disrespect. Arguing and fighting have become the norm. Rolling of the eyes with hand signs and body language yell the message that they are saying.
She does not even want to go home.
Time to rein them in. Sound scary? Maybe ...but you CAN DO IT and you must! If you think it is hard now I promise you it will only get worse as you are caught in a spiral.
I have a lot of thought and counsel on this matter ~ If you would like to talk email me for a date!
Blessings!
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Dehydration
A conversation that I had with a friend last night has prompted this reminder.
Her son had an intestinal thing going on and he was looking emaciated. This was a great concern for her. Here are her words of what happened:
Even though he was sleeping i went to pray over him and this time putting my hands on
him the sandpaper texture of his skin seemed " so loud" to me that I was surprised I didn't
notice it earlier. I checked his mouth and it was dry. Thinking back thru the day, even
though we were giving him drinks, he had only peed once all day. So I called the Dr. and he
needed 2 bags of IV fluids! He still looks all bones but his face isn't sunk in looking and he
is acting MUCH better!
Another story: last year when my mom was was settling down to play a game of scrabble with a friend, he came and got me 20 minutes into the game. She was just sitting there. Not talking just looking at her letters. I asked her a few questions and she was in a "complete zone". We took her to the emergency room where she was diagnosed having a UTI and being very dehydrated. She ALWAYS carries around a drink with her so we did not notice. As soon as a bag of fluids were in her she was back to normal.
The Doctor said that dehydration is very common in young children and the elderly. SO let's not forget this! During this season of colds and stomach bugs remember to have juices, water, pops etc etc available for the invalid to eat...even jello.
Better safe than sorry.
Blessings!
Her son had an intestinal thing going on and he was looking emaciated. This was a great concern for her. Here are her words of what happened:
Even though he was sleeping i went to pray over him and this time putting my hands on
him the sandpaper texture of his skin seemed " so loud" to me that I was surprised I didn't
notice it earlier. I checked his mouth and it was dry. Thinking back thru the day, even
though we were giving him drinks, he had only peed once all day. So I called the Dr. and he
needed 2 bags of IV fluids! He still looks all bones but his face isn't sunk in looking and he
is acting MUCH better!
Another story: last year when my mom was was settling down to play a game of scrabble with a friend, he came and got me 20 minutes into the game. She was just sitting there. Not talking just looking at her letters. I asked her a few questions and she was in a "complete zone". We took her to the emergency room where she was diagnosed having a UTI and being very dehydrated. She ALWAYS carries around a drink with her so we did not notice. As soon as a bag of fluids were in her she was back to normal.
The Doctor said that dehydration is very common in young children and the elderly. SO let's not forget this! During this season of colds and stomach bugs remember to have juices, water, pops etc etc available for the invalid to eat...even jello.
Better safe than sorry.
Blessings!
Sunday, February 5, 2012
Taking Advantage of Grace (A Home With Out Walls)
A young mom posed a question to me today.
A number of things had changed in this young family over the past couple of months, a move, a new baby and all that that entails to name a few. One of the little ones is having a problem at bedtime. Grace has been offered numerous times. The parents felt the changes were the source of the issue and he also has been battling a cold.
But now "it" is starting to look and sound different. There seems to be some subtle anger and resistance involved. Instead of "mommy fix my blanket"..it has turned into "NO not that way" with some kicking and whining.
I have written before (I thought) about creating a "Home without Walls". What I mean by this is we really want to train our children to obey and feel secure no matter what our family situation is at the time. New baby, move, sickness, company etc. we need to work past the excuses and train our children that our "systems" are the way it is going to be. When it is nap time it is wonderful if the child can settle down no matter where you are ~ Nanny's bed, beside mom on the couch or in the car seat. I think that this is brought about by consistency which leads to security.
I suggested to this mom that she again begin to talk about this during the day. Have a one on one. and then repeat it as the day goes on and for a couple of days.
"Eli, you have been waking up too many times in the night. There is no need for this anymore. You have your sippy cup on the night stand and know how to go to the bathroom on your own. You have your blanket and teddy and have been tucked in and prayed for. That is all you need and from now on I am expecting that if you wake up you will roll over and go back to sleep. IF you wake the other children there is going to be a consequence (name it) that you are not going to want to face. Do you understand me?"
Answer any questions or concerns that he might have and continue to bring it up off and on thru out the next couple of days..
Stick to what you have said..... be consistent immediately. Do not let your guard down.
I know that it all looks different in the wee hours of the morning when you are exhausted. But it is here that many times the problems are developed as we are willing to do or say almost anything to just go back to bed. This prolongs the situation.
I hope that this has been clear and that you will find some rest for your weary body
Blessings!
A number of things had changed in this young family over the past couple of months, a move, a new baby and all that that entails to name a few. One of the little ones is having a problem at bedtime. Grace has been offered numerous times. The parents felt the changes were the source of the issue and he also has been battling a cold.
But now "it" is starting to look and sound different. There seems to be some subtle anger and resistance involved. Instead of "mommy fix my blanket"..it has turned into "NO not that way" with some kicking and whining.
I have written before (I thought) about creating a "Home without Walls". What I mean by this is we really want to train our children to obey and feel secure no matter what our family situation is at the time. New baby, move, sickness, company etc. we need to work past the excuses and train our children that our "systems" are the way it is going to be. When it is nap time it is wonderful if the child can settle down no matter where you are ~ Nanny's bed, beside mom on the couch or in the car seat. I think that this is brought about by consistency which leads to security.
I suggested to this mom that she again begin to talk about this during the day. Have a one on one. and then repeat it as the day goes on and for a couple of days.
"Eli, you have been waking up too many times in the night. There is no need for this anymore. You have your sippy cup on the night stand and know how to go to the bathroom on your own. You have your blanket and teddy and have been tucked in and prayed for. That is all you need and from now on I am expecting that if you wake up you will roll over and go back to sleep. IF you wake the other children there is going to be a consequence (name it) that you are not going to want to face. Do you understand me?"
Answer any questions or concerns that he might have and continue to bring it up off and on thru out the next couple of days..
Stick to what you have said..... be consistent immediately. Do not let your guard down.
I know that it all looks different in the wee hours of the morning when you are exhausted. But it is here that many times the problems are developed as we are willing to do or say almost anything to just go back to bed. This prolongs the situation.
I hope that this has been clear and that you will find some rest for your weary body
Blessings!
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